Babies and holidays make an interesting cocktail

Someone extremely wise told me that travelling with babies is basically like being at home....with the possible upside of a better climate and the likely downside of major inconvenience humping caseloads of baby paraphernalia onto buses, planes and trains.

Having now braved our first flight and holiday to the much maligned Tenerife, I'd like to add some colour to the advice above.

Downsides first....

Packing was indeed traumatic. Given my ongoing issues with indecision and procrastination, selecting my daughter's S/S14 wardrobe (yep, that's spring/summer to the non fashionistas) provided hours of amusement leaving little time to consider my own travel essentials. Needless to say she has looked much better dressed and cared for than me on most days this last week. Judge me by my child's appearance please, not my own.

Similarly, I did not think all the practicalities through. Logistics, yes, but the reality..no. Far from being an opportunity for tanning and relaxation en famille, it has felt more like a bizarre extended boxing match where my husband and I tag each other into, and out of, the ring every hour to square up to daughter duty. Not that she's a nightmare, but her needs are rather at odds with our own; she loves shade, we love sun...she wants to play, we want to sleep. Rubbish combinations. Add in the stress of a resort populated largely by geriatrics, where everyone wants sleep and quiet..and you are the evil couple bringing a wailing munchkin to the adjacent sun lounger. Cue glares from men, sympathy smiles from women and a general feeling of parental incompetence. I now see why people with children holiday in places with more people with children. Solidarity in numbers.

On the upsides... "Ola sunshine!" Glorious heat on the bones. Husband time also rocks, as does father-daughter bonding time. Also huge gratitude for being looked after by the professionals. No cooking, no cleaning.  My lazy ass could not be happier. Basically it all adds up to me feeling a little more like me, and a little less like a walking dairy.

If I were to reverse the clock and give advice to myself with the benefit of hindsight I would make the following points:

1. Tenerife is NOT in the third world, it may be an island, but they have nappies, formula and babies too. In fact the third world also has babies..and they survive without much of the gubbins that I have been brainwashed to believe they require. It seems 70 nappies was a little OTT for 10 days.

2. Do your hotel homework. We were allocated a cot, microwave, kettle and changing mat. Massive result..except I'd already packed our travel cot and lost half my suitcase in the process. AND Bring travel wash. Overpriced hotel laundry services suck (€3 for a bib!! WTF!) But who wants to return home with a suitcase of vomity muslins?

4. Explore what the hotel means by 'babysitting service'. In our case it meant some half-cut crazy Spanish lady coming to sit in our room for a few hours (at great expense) whilst we ate in the restaurant downstairs. Soooo much easier to plonk her in the buggy!! (Massive love for McLaren-legendary piece of kit)

5. Don't scrimp on the room. Seriously. As a serial bargain hunter this is worth spanking money on. We started in a room too small to swing a mouse in, let alone a cat. Cot practically next to my ear = not relaxing. Short of putting the cot in the bathtub we decided that upgrading to a larger room would enable greater comfort and 'privacy'. Money well spent.

All in all, well worth the effort, but next time I'm packing less, winging it more and maybe bringing a grandparent or two!